He Offered

I would like everyone to notice that in response to my last post my old college roommate actually offered to have my head bashed in with a boulder whilst I sleep. Hell, not even a rock. . . A BOULDER!

Only a true friend. . .

Turkey day has come and gone. Appetite for turkey has done the same. I managed not to buy anything on Black Friday but I'm sure I'll make up for it in the next few weeks like a good little American. You see I'm moving into the house a few days early and I needs me a bed and maybe somewhere to put my clothes. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about used furniture still at this point in my life, but I draw the line at a used mattress. . . actually I draw the line quite a bit further back but since the new bed is my only concern, um, that's all I'll be concerned with. Right.

So you all know how it is, you move into a new place and there are things that need a'buyin'. . . even when the new place is fully furnished. Still haven't figured out how that works. Now I'll have a slightly more solid address and that means it's time to register the H2O (no, I don't own a Hummer, I own an Element and can't think of anything wittier to call it right now) and maybe even get a Florida license. Shoot, I might just run right out and find a charity to send me way too many of those little address labels with my new numbers so I can feel guilty about not sending them any money for something I didn't ask for in the first place but still intend to use for the two pieces of physical mail I send every month.

Phew, I think I just channeled Sammy Davis Jr. He didn't donate for those labels either, ya know and Adam Sandler once told that Mr. Jr. only had one eye. . . but I still think he just had a facial tick (like Galen Pallas).

Well I guess I've only got about thirty-two hours left before it's time to return to work. It's supposed to be in the mid-eighties and "sticky" all week. Good times they are a'comin'.

(Insert inspirational, deep and witty words of wisdom here.)